Oh the Shame!

It’s been almost a year since my last blog entry… So much for dedication.

I don’t understand what my problem is when it comes to sticking to a task. Any Task! Yes, sometimes it is just pure laziness, but I like to think that there’s more to it than that.

Either way, whether it’s keeping up with my online course or following a new hobby, I’m thoroughly enthusiastic for, say, the first week but after that things go downhill fast. BUT, there is hope. I’ve tackled this little motivation problem head on and so far I haven’t run out of steam. So, let’s go back to how my motivation project began.

Two weeks ago something snapped inside me, I was sick and tired of being fat. No, not just fat. Fat and Lazy. For months I was making excuses for my weight gain, like blaming England’s fatty foods and miserable climate. (although I do feel that way.) I love sailing but I didn’t want to go for the lessons because the water would be too cold. I wanted to do more leisure cycling but it’s always raining. I was going to start cooking every meal but it was too expensive for my budget… You get the picture. It’s very easy to make up a million reasons not to do something. Fortunately, the more excuses I made the more sick of myself I became. I used to just jump head first into situations and make things work as I go along, now my life consisted of pathetic excuses. No more I say. NO MORE!

And so it began.

First and foremost, it was truth time. I was fat and unfit, not because I didn’t have the time to exercise or plan my meals but I was simply being lazy and disorganised. I also had to settle with the fact that THIS IS ENGLAND and the rain is going nowhere. So, if I wasn’t going to get my exercise the way I used to, which was outdoor activities. I’d have to *shudder* join a gym. Now I hate gyms, no, I LOATHE gyms to the very core of my being.

Here is a list of reasons why I hate gyms.

  • The changing rooms – I don’t want to get naked in front of everyone else thank you!
  • Mirrors – my self-esteem is low enough without having to see my round red face staring back at me.
  • The people – I never see another person in the gym who needs to be there, everyone’s already perfect. It’s freaking intimidating.
  • The music – it’s crap.
  • I have no idea what the hell I am doing.
So the first step I have taken is learning to work out in a gym. I’ve done this by finding myself a personal trainer and as everyone knows, personal trainers aren’t exactly cheap. So this is only a step towards being comfortable and confident in a gym. – Although I’d train with her forever if I could, it’s only my second session but I never thought I could find exercise so fun.-
By going for about 8 personal training sessions I can learn a variety of cardio and strength exercises, and get to know my way around the gym equipment. Essentially like a crash course in gym training.
Alas, all this talk about weight loss and motivation is easier said than done. If, in a month’s time I still feel as motivated as I do now it will definitely be something to write about. There is one thing that is different… I’m now fully aware that weight loss and fitness requires hard work and discipline. I intend to change my entire life, not just by body.

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